Opinion & Analysis
The ranger reveals!
Uh oh. Here he comes. Headed right for your twosome, foursome, or fivesome. You spotted him on hole 4, in the faded white cart with the orange pole and yellow flag up ahead in the woods, lurking. And now, what does HE want?
1. “The Truth.” If you and your buddies are standing next to your cart, your athletic-fit golf slacks covered up to the knees with black pond muck, and milfoil trailing from your cart wheels, you’re probably too close to the lateral water hazard. Just own it.
2. “Keep up.” Remember, he wants you to enjoy the six-plus hours you’ll be out there. The snap hooks and peel draws, the towering slices and butter cuts. The miraculous downhill 40 ft. birdie putts: All of it. Just stay in sight of the group ahead of you.
3. “Drinking.” The group ahead of you probably is, and you certainly are. Everyone knows it’s a vital part of tolerating the game. Just don’t flaunt it. Use plastic glasses. Travel light. Half gallons of vodka or your Uncle Shifty’s moonshine take up room for your cigar humidor.
Pro tip: Go right for the “Robustos.” Get the heaving over with. The effects of twice a year cigar smoking on a draft beer breakfast can hurt, or become your handicap.
Once again, if you “Keep up,” everything will be fine. Sort of.
4. “On course advice.” You should know that the beer girl is far better at her game than you are at yours. She gets more practice. So be polite. Tip well. She’s probably working on her masters in psychology and can spot the alpha male in your group in seven seconds.
More advice from the Ranger
Watch the weather. The desire to “play just one more” is quickly overridden when your cart is sliding sideways downhill, on a rain-slick fairway, headed for the hickorys.
Respect the game, the course, the staff, and yourself. If you’re a guest at a resort, don’t drag the furniture out of your fairway villa, set it on fire, and get caught sleeping in a greenside bunker the next morning. (true story)
And please; no skulled lob wedges off the living room carpet, out the sliding glass door, over the balcony railing and headed for the group coming up 18. (also true)
Remember, the ranger’s “hostile resting face” is not his fault. It’s really just bemusement. When he says “Use someone else’s better judgment,” it’s for your own good. Think of the Ranger as a mobile “players assistant.” You want the booming bass music three fairways overturned down, he’s your guy.
You want the groups ahead to speed up? Ask him. It’s already driving him crazy too.
Above all, have fun. Enjoy the scenery. Golf is a difficult game that tests one’s mettle and reveals one’s character.
Just don’t become one.
Opinion & Analysis
AVL: My U.S. Amateur local qualifying experience
This past Monday, I played in the U.S. Amateur local qualifier at Rock Creek Country Club in Portland, Oregon. A full tee sheet from 7:30 a.m. to 1:55 p.m., the top 11 scores would make it to the U.S. Amateur final qualifying.
I teed off at 10:48 a.m.. With the 7:30 am tee time, you can get a feel for the leaders’ pace, and they were off and running on the challenging setup at Rock Creek.
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Getting to the highlight of the round on the par five 17th, a drive up the left side and 212 yards left to the front hole location. I took out a 5-iron with plans of middle of the green. The ball ended up 8 feet left of the hole, pin high. A slight downhill putt dropped in for an eagle 3 on the 17th. With the cut line looking to be anywhere from -2 to even par. This was the boost I had been waiting for all day.
With making par from the trees on 18, it was time to wait for a potential playoff with a posted score of one under par 71.
Three hours later, it was playoff time. 8 players for 6 spots. I made par on the playoff hole, which was good enough to advance to the U.S. Amateur final qualifying in July. USGA qualifiers sure deliver on all of the emotions in golf!
Club Junkie
Building my 2026 gamer WITB: Ranking the contenders and new putter projects – Club Junkie Podcast
The annual What’s In The Bag build is underway, and on this episode of Club Junkie, Brian breaks down the clubs currently leading the race for a spot in his 2026 gamer setup. From drivers and fairway woods to irons, wedges, and shafts, he ranks the equipment that’s performing best and explains what’s separating the front runners from the rest of the field.
Brian also heads into the workshop to discuss several putter projects currently on the bench. From head options and shaft choices to build ideas and testing plans, he shares what he’s working on and which putters could become serious contenders for the bag this season.
If you’re a gear junkie who loves equipment testing, club building, and the never-ending pursuit of the perfect setup, this episode is for you.
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Club Junkie
Tour Edge Exotics mini driver review + TaylorMade Spider ZT Max first look – Club Junkie
On this episode of Club Junkie, I put the new Tour Edge Exotics Mini Driver to the test and break down the performance, forgiveness, distance, and where it fits compared to a traditional driver or strong fairway wood. If you have been curious about adding a mini driver to the bag, this one is worth a look.
I also dive into the new TaylorMade Spider ZT Max putter that was recently spotted and discuss the growing zero torque putter trend. Plus, there is a closer look at the new Project X Titan Yellow shaft showing up on the PGA Tour and what makes it different from other profiles currently out there.
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TEN
Mar 13, 2019 at 9:56 am
This is written by one experienced battle tested ranger! He’s been to the front lines and returned to tell truths in a humorous well written essay. Now if only everyone in the group could read! Ha.
JP
Mar 13, 2019 at 12:42 am
And for the love of God, play the tee box appropriate to your skill level and athletic ability!